A therapist’s guide to understanding emotional suppression, everyday avoidance, and gentle ways to heal.
We all have coping habits behaviours that offer a sense of relief when emotions feel too heavy to hold. Whether it’s scrolling through social media, procrastinating, binge eating, or overworking, these behaviours often have one thing in common:
They help us avoid what we’re really feeling.
In my work with clients, I’ve noticed this pattern again and again. People who struggle to express their true thoughts and emotions often build habits that soothe them temporarily. But beneath those habits are often unacknowledged emotions and unprocessed stories.
🔁 The Suppression Cycle
Here’s how it often plays out:
A difficult thought or feeling arises
Instead of expressing it, we suppress it
The discomfort builds internally
We act out an avoidant habit (e.g., scrolling, eating, isolating)
That habit brings brief relief but often ends in guilt or frustration
The cycle begins again
And the more often we do this, the more that behaviour becomes a go-to automatic, unconscious, and self-reinforcing.
You may feel emotionally flat, anxious, or even stuck in a loop where you’re trying to “feel better” but don’t know how.
🧠 The Mind-Body Cost
What we don’t express doesn’t disappear.
It gets stored in our thoughts, our nervous systems, and our bodies.
Unacknowledged feelings often show up as:
Racing thoughts or overthinking
Physical symptoms like tension, fatigue, or shortness of breath
Disconnection from purpose or joy
Low motivation or difficulty focusing
Mood swings, irritability, or numbness
These symptoms are signals, not flaws. Your system is asking for space. For processing. For expression.
🔓 The First Step: Awareness
The way out of emotional suppression isn’t to force yourself to “snap out of it.” It’s to build gentle awareness of what’s really going on.
Try this 4-step practice:
1️⃣ Catch the Thought
Notice the moment you’re reaching for your habit. What’s the trigger? What emotion or thought showed up right before?
2️⃣ Write It Down
Journaling is a powerful emotional regulation tool. Try using prompts like:
“Right now I feel…”
“I’m thinking that…”
“I notice I’m avoiding…”
Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) supports this — when we externalise our thoughts, we reduce their emotional intensity.
3️⃣ Sit with the Emotion
Ask yourself: What does this feeling do to my body?
Do you feel:
Tight in the chest or throat?
Heaviness in your limbs?
Restlessness? Shaky hands?
Just notice, without judgment.
4️⃣ Reframe Gently
Once the emotion is seen and heard, ask:
Can I see this from another angle?
What would I say to a friend feeling this way?
Can I offer myself compassion instead of critique?
This is where you begin to rewrite your internal story.
🖋️ Write a New Ending
When you allow your emotions to be felt and expressed rather than avoided you begin to reclaim your power.
You no longer let a suppressed thought spiral into unhealthy habits.
Instead, you pause. You process. You shift.
This is not about becoming “perfect” or positive all the time. It’s about choosing to stay with yourself especially when it’s uncomfortable.
Because healing doesn’t come from ignoring your pain.
It comes from listening to it, understanding it, and choosing to respond with care.
💬 Final Thought
Your emotions are not enemies.
They are messengers asking for your attention.
And when you begin to honour them through journaling, self-reflection, and gentle reframing you don’t just heal from the past.
You build a life that is emotionally honest, grounded, and yours.
Want help breaking your emotional loops and rewriting your story?
Explore 1:1 therapy or coaching at http://www.fwsrewrite.com or contact me to book a session.
You’re not alone in this and you’re never too late to start healing.
With care,
Angel Sgkouni
Therapist | Mental Health Coach | Founder of FWS Rewrite
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